


I return to you, always

by helpImlost



Category: Detroit Evolution - Fandom, Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Ambiguous Hank Anderson and Connor Relationship, Detroit Evolution, Developing Relationship, Light Angst, M/M, Recovery, Self-Indulgent, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-14
Updated: 2020-04-14
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:47:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23642596
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/helpImlost/pseuds/helpImlost
Summary: In the beginning, a lot of days are bad.As time goes on, the good days become the norm.However, recovery is not a straight path.
Relationships: Upgraded Connor | RK900/Gavin Reed
Comments: 4
Kudos: 122





	I return to you, always

Most days are good, and there is nothing more that Nines could ask for. Laying in bed together with Gavin is different, after they confess their feelings to each other. RK900 knows that he can enter stasis and rest besides his partner without having to wake up to a fight the next day.

There are still times though, mornings when his presence becomes too much and Gavin suffocates on the closeness of his body, of his mind, and lashes out. Those days Nines tries to be patient, he backs off until Gavin doesn’t look like he’ll unravel into nothing anymore, and then he waits. Waits for Gavin to calm down, waits for Gavin to yell at him to back off further, waits for him to break anyway despite Nines’ best effort to adhere to the rules and boundaries they’d agreed on during their many talks. He vows to himself to pick up the pieces, to slowly hand them back to Gavin and ask if he wants help to put himself back together. Most times Gavin accepts his help, and they begin mending the cracked pieces into slightly less broken ones.

The day they’d finally confessed to each other properly, he’d told Gavin he wasn’t going anywhere, and Gavin had told him the same. But some days, Gavin breaks violently, and he seems so far away that not even Nines can reach him. Those days Gavin yells at Nines to get the fuck out of their apartment, followed by sharp words meant to cut as deep as possible. No one said recovery was an easy or straight road. And Nines knows better to be dissapointed when Gavin gets like that, but it's hard not to rise to the harsh lies and insults that Gavin use with such preciscion he might as well have shot Nines in his thirium pump.

Nines always leaves, but they both know that he will come back, despite what he might yell in return at Gavin out of frustration. Despite the accidental cruelty of his words as he questions what the hell Gavin is thinking, he never aims where he knows it will deal real damage to his partner. Nines usually isn’t one for swearing, and sometimes his emotions get the better of him, too. But he never wants to actively hurt Gavin. Those times when he almost slips though he thinks of Ada, and the things she said. Wonders if he’d be better at supporting Gavin if his own shortcomings didn’t get in the way so much as he leaves the apartment. He immediately strikes the thoughts down each time they appear. He’d deviated her for a reason. Let her go instead of arresting her for a reason, damn it.

He doesn’t go to Tina, because she is Gavin’s friend first and foremost and Nines knows its her that Gavin usually calls in those moments when he and Nines have a fight. The last thing he wants is to take that support away from his partner. So Nines has a habit of ending up on Hank’s doorstep whenever he gets kicked out during a fight. Thankfully it is far from a regular occurrence, both Nines and Gavin have done so much work to get better. A slow process, but they cherish every small step towards recovery they make, and try so hard to comfort and support each other whenever they stumble back.

But some days are bad. Bad enough that Nines puts his uneasy relationship with his predecessor aside to seek guidance from both him and the Lieutenant. They always welcome him, despite him clearly interrupting a movie night or two. He tries not to be too much of a bother, waits for them to finish up what they’re doing before carefully sharing whatever issue has landed him there. He’s always careful, he knows that despite Gavin’s progress when it comes to androids both Hank and Connor have less than good opinions of him, and Nines doesn’t want to make it worse. He makes an effort to bring up their positive interactions more often to the senior pair to balance out these less than ideal moments in their relationship. Hank still looks unconvinced, Connor looks like he’s trying to understand but doesn’t want to put too much thought into it. They seem almost surprised that Nines and Gavin are able to remain professional at work when these arguments lasts for more than one day. Nines wonders why they wouldn't, for all their personal flaws both him and Gavin were professionals. Hank laughs, Connors tries to mediate, Nines vaguely wonders why he'd come to them for advice at all while trying not to _snap_ at them.

Especially when their advice usually ends up not so subtly pointing towards a break up, followed by cold remarks about how much of a mess Gavin is and how Nines can do so much _better_. Usually, Nines is already fairly upset at the start of these conversations, but he remains resolute in not taking out his frustrations on the people he sought out for advice, no matter how insensitive or counterproductive that advice is. He always ends up thanking them and leaving early to avoid yet more fights, politely dodging the empty offers of staying the night, and wanders the streets until the early hours of the mornings.

It is nice, in a way. The walks have a way of clearing his head, his thoughts turned inwards while leisurely scanning his surroundings as he strolls down the streets of Detroit. He’d made his new “Zen Garden” into Gavin’s apartment, but it is fairly small and he’s expanded the area outside of it. Every so often he spots something in reality; a building, a tree, some landmark, that piques his interest, and sometimes he adds it to his mind space. A fair amount of these additions had been suggested by Gavin himself, echoing his virtual counterpart right before Nines had deleted him. Except that the real Gavin is still around, and Nines always finds himself calming down enough on these late night walks that he finds his patience for the man. Of course they will have to talk about the fight. After all, it is mostly when they stop actively communicating, that the always there and underlying issues become active problems. Usually they are able to work it out, even when it gets as bad as some days are.

Sometimes Gavin has to book an appointment with his therapist, and Nines lets Gavin lean on him when he makes the calls, because he knows that Gavin _hates_ it, hates to admit that something is wrong, is so used to hiding it and letting it eat away at him in silence. But he’d promised Nines, promised _himself_ to get help, to take the steps to start getting better, and so he does it with gritted teeth and tears at the edges of his eyes. Nines makes it a point every time to tell Gavin how proud he is of him when he does it.

And luckily, Nines can only count two times when the fights had gotten so bad that he thought Gavin would cut him off for good. Then he’d rented short term apartments in order to keep his distance, to let Gavin breathe and calm down, but he’d never had to stay in those for more than five days before Gavin called him and asked him to come home. Only one of those times Nines considered not doing it, and he’d felt such shame at his own immature tantrum afterwards when he was back with Gavin that he had been the one who cried for once. It had scared Gavin to death, and that had terrified Nines more than any of their arguments ever could. Seeing his human so distraught not because Nines was hurt, but because Nines had been thinking about hurting him, and all Gavin cared about was Nines’ feelings.

They were both really the worst combination of issues, but Nines still smiles when the familiar alert of Gavin calling him pops up when Nines wanders around the sleeping city. He always answers, and when Gavin apologises and asks him to come home Nines agrees easily. He calculates the fastest route back to their apartment, informs Gavin of the ETA, then breaks into a sprint. Even if he’s still pissed at Gavin, even if the fight has yet to be resolved, the fact that Gavin has calmed down enough to ask Nines to come home always makes him happy. Makes his footsteps feel so much lighter as they move across the pavement, bringing him closer to _home_ with every step.

Hank doesn’t like it, Connor doesn’t get it, and sometimes Nines himself feels that tratious doubt ensnare his thoughts. But in the end, no matter what, he always ends up back with Gavin. He’d told Gavin he wasn’t going anywhere, and though he might stray for a moment, he always returns to his side in the end. Because he loves him more than anything, and he knows that Gavin feels the same. So Nines comes back to the apartment, they talk, they kiss, Gavin lets Nines hold him with exposed hands. They try to figure out the best course of action, to sort out whatever triggered the fight to the best of their abilities. Lets themselves join back together so they can do it as a team, as partners.

Some days are bad. But luckily, as times goes on, they become less frequent and further apart. Sometimes they still stumble back, and Nines might have to leave for a bit, but he always comes back to Gavin, because there is nowhere else he’d rather be.

And most days, most days now are good.

**Author's Note:**

> Hoooo boy what about that movie huh? I can't go outside for a sprint to shake out the feels but turns out writing a fanfic worked just as well!  
> I have no personal experiance with this kind of relationship but I tried! I can only hope I've done these two half the justice they deserve. 
> 
> (This was written in one sitting with almost no editing. Hope it was still enjoyable despite english not being my first language lol.)


End file.
